Having owned the official VHS videocassette of this movie for many years but without ever having watched it, on 4 April 2019 I finally decided to do so (I still own a couple of fully-functioning VCRs). After feeling stressed out from the sadness of the past weekend, which marked the 6th anniversary of my mother's passing, what could be more relaxing, I thought, than a fantasy movie populated solely by puppets both created and directed by those friendly Muppet makers Jim Henson and Frank Oz? Think again!
The movie in question, originally released in 1982, was The Dark Crystal, set in the mystical land of Thra, and to say that it is dark in name and even darker in nature would be a vast understatement. Despite being marketed as a family film, it is unrelentingly grim and unremittingly gruesome, from beginning to end, with some of the most horrific, hideous, repellent reptilian villains (the Skeksis) and other animatronic monsters that I have ever seen.
Moreover, they all seem to spend almost every available moment attempting to slaughter one another (and frequently succeeding) in the Skeksis's determined bid to guard the eponymous crystal that had inadvertently created them but which they now use to drain and consume the life-force out of their victims. These latter include the very small and helpless hobbit-like Podlings – reduced by the crystal's deadly beam to mindless, soulless slaves – and all in a mere PG (Parental Guidance)-rated movie at that!
Had I seen The Dark Crystal as a child, with or without parental guidance or accompaniment, I'd have had nightmares for weeks, and as a nascent cryptozoologist with a lifelong love of monsters I didn't scare easily. Having said that, and to be fair, in visual terms it is undeniably a groundbreaking technological tour-de-force.
The humanoid gelflings in particular are so uncannily life-like in both body movements and facial expressions that throughout the film I couldn't make my mind up whether these really were puppets or were actually humans inside costumes and wearing moveable masks. But as the short 'making of the movie' documentary at the end of the film reveals, they are indeed wholly puppets, with every facial twitch and eyeball movement operated via radio-control and other undetectable mechanisms.
Even so, a little dusting of levity here and there wouldn't have gone amiss, lightening – and lighting – up what is unquestionably the darkest vision ever envisaged and brought to the screen by Henson & Oz. Kermit and Miss Piggy wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes, that's for sure – dispatched, devoured, and digested by the ravenous Skeksis before they'd even have had chance to sing: "It’s time to play the music. It’s time to light the lights. It’s time to meet the Muppets on The Muppet Show tonight!"
Having said all of that, I do know and accept that The Dark Crystal has become something of a cult movie down through the decades among fantasy film buffs, with countless acolytes worldwide. Moreover, as recently as last year there was even a prequel TV series, The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance, which premiered on Netflix in August 2019. However, it was cancelled after just one season. Had the phantasmagorical world of The Dark Crystal finally lost its sparkle?
Certainly, at least as far as I am concerned, The Dark Crystal is very much an "each to their own" or "Marmite" fantasy flick – you either love it or hate it. So, if you haven't ever viewed it and are wondering whether this may be your kind of movie, click here to watch a short official trailer, and here to view a longer representative Skeksis-featuring excerpt, which should give you an idea of what to expect from the full film.
And to view a complete listing of all of my Shuker In MovieLand blog's other film reviews and articles (each one instantly accessible via a direct clickable link), please click HERE!
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